No Country For Old Men

Issue 348

The Age Debate in Politics

• “In 1900, gerontologists considered ‘old’ to be 47.  Today, you are considered ‘youngest-old’ at 65, ‘middle-old’ at 75, and at 85, you are a member of the ‘oldest-old’”
• “An elderly friend once told me there were four ages to life:  youth, middle age, old age, and ‘you look great!’"
• A handy tip (from Ted Kennedy) for remembering names –“If a man is over 50, just ask ‘how’s the back?’ and he’ll think you know him”
• “When I get together with old friends, our first ritual is an ‘organ recital’ – ‘how’s your back? knee? heart? hip? ….”

Quirky News You Might Have Missed

• A research team from Cambridge Uni tells us that eating broad beans can be a cure for the blues (the mood, not the music – please keep up – Ed)

• This month's Optimism Award goes to the (unnamed) man who tried to smuggle 104 (!) live snakes from Hong Kong to mainland China by secreting them in his underpants (brings tears to your eyes....)

• The Victoria Line is officially the hottest line on the Underground (just thought you might want to know that)

• According to (yet) more essential research, the humble goldfish has apparently been much maligned – far from having a short memory, apparently they can remember things for up to eleven months (which must mean they get very bored?)  

• Whilst some people seem to have difficulty distinguishing left from right (You Know Who You Are), in some parts of the world they don't even have the appropriate words.  In Bali, they give directions by saying "towards the mountain", "towards the sea", "clockwise round the shore", or "anti-clockwise round the shore", whilst a tribe in Oz called the Guugu Yimithirr (sounds like one of those unfortunate unintentional text messages) use compass points rather than left and right – "you have an ant on your SouthEast leg"...

Columbo Corner

The census, carried out every ten years, is well-known to be a fruitful source of information – but sometimes, one regrets that it doesn't come with explanatory footnotes.  It has been compulsory to record your occupation since the 1841 census, but unfortunately, the meanings of some of the occupations on record in the 19^th Century have been lost in the mists of time.  These include Budget Bummer, Spilch Dealer, Horse Marine, Oliver Man, Piano Puncher, Butt Woman (no comment – Ed), and Brazil Maker (definitely no comment – Ed) ....  Answers on a postcard please.

Cheers for now,
Tom

Board Announcements

For a light-hearted look at some of what TAB does, check out this video:

I presently run two Boards: 

• Blue (for people who run large businesses) – one spare seat
• White Board (for people who run fast-growing businesses) — three spare seats

Get in touch if you want to find out more.

Final words of wisdom (not mine)